No Expectations (TBC)

The Four Agreements by Miguel Ruiz.  http://www.amazon.com/Four-Agreements-Practical-Personal-Freedom/dp/1878424319

1. Be Impeccable With Your Word.
2. Don't Take Anything Personally.
3. Don't Make Assumptions.
4. Always Do Your Best.

I’ve talked about this book before. I’ve changed #3 to No Expectations, due to the fact that if I assume something is going to be great or awful, then I’ll probably be disappointed, one way or the other. Which to me means – have no expectations.

This is my mantra, when I remember. It works every time, when I remember.

I drive to Lakeside for the conference and push all thoughts of what I am about to experience away. No expectations. Whatever happens will hurt/heal better.

I relish the ride. I love the open road. I’ve always said, ‘Give me a highway and I’ll be happy.’

I want to buy some wine. I am assailed by doubts. Will the B&B let me bring wine in? Will the religious ‘summer resort’ kick me out if they find me with a bottle? I fight the good fight. I’m no longer a child and bound by a child’s rules. I can drink a glass of wine if I want to. The storekeeper at the local farmer’s market is fun. We giggle about being adults and able to live our lives as we want. I buy two bottles of local wines, some cheese, and crackers. The bill is more than expected, but we are out in the middle of nowhere. High prices are to be expected.

Whoa! Did I use the ‘E’ word?

The countryside has changed. Long years ago, this area of the lakeshore felt like Cape Cod. Pleasant, cozy, serene. There are huge new marinas that blot out the lake view. New houses have cropped up – for those who will be lucky to spend one week-end a year at the lake.

Never the mind. It takes me back to before my husband died. What fun we had. The memories are not bitter-sweet. I had expected my heart to be sorrow-filled. It’s not – there is a quiet joy surrounding it.

Whoa again! That blasted ‘E’ word!

Finding Lakeside is easy, due to the directions from the shopkeeper. Finding the B&B is a little more difficult. I didn’t bring the name or the address of the place, but Lakeside is smallish. I didn’t expect any problems finding it.

Ok. So my mantra’s a little rusty.

Early spring means there are few people here. I find one kind man who points me in the right direction when I ask for something that I hoped resembled the B&B’s name. I find a good parking space – unexpected.

Yikes!

I will continue this tomorrow. I didn’t expect it to go this long.